because that's how it feels when things get really bad. it's not just feeling sleepy from a long day. it's a bone-deep exhaustion of life and of existence that overtakes your entire being. it's not caring if you don't get to be happy ever again as long as you don't have to feel sad or angry or anything at all anymore. it's feeling like you're stuck in the same spot forever as everything catches up to you and the walls close in and the ground opens up.
and it's really tiring.
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